The Gate of Resistance, Contemplation 001
A new, once-a-month series for paradoxical insight and immersive stillness
HI!
Life As I See It is all about giving you a front-row seat to my weird perspective on the world—and if you're here, I'm guessing you kind of dig that.
As a Yoga Therapist who's fallen in love with Zen Koans, I've discovered something fascinating: there's magic in blending the mind-bending paradox of Koans with the deep stillness that I can find in yogic practice. And in typical "Alex" fashion, I've taken these traditional practices and, well, painted all over the walls with them. 🫣
This brings me to my exciting news: I'm launching Contemplations, a once-a-month series that follows my personal practice of using paradoxical prompts to break through inner resistance and find clarity.
Why These Contemplations Matter
They shatter our logical walls, pushing us into perspectives we'd otherwise miss
They reveal our hidden beliefs and blind spots through wrestling with riddles that shouldn't make sense
They create space for both playful exploration and deep introspection
They gently push us out of our comfort zones toward genuine change
How Do You Use These Contemplations?
I’m so glad you asked. Honestly, any way you want! But if it helps, here’s a snapshot of my own personal practice:
Read the prompt (which I'm deliberately not calling a Koan—I'm not that full of myself)
Embrace the initial frustration and confusion
Write down reactions, feelings, and questions
Practice mindful breathing to settle the mind
Meditate on your primary question
Express gratitude for showing up
Journal your reflections
The next day, I repeat the process, starting again with the original prompt and my insights from the previous day. I usually stick with one Contemplation for about a week and repeat this process roughly once a month.
This Month’s Theme: Resistance
Given the themes I’ve been exploring lately, I’ve crafted a new Contemplation on something I’ve found both frustrating and fascinating: resistance. It turns out the idea of sitting with our resistance resonates with many of us. My own journey led to a powerful breakthrough—a flash of clarity that unearthed old memories (maybe “tucked away” is more accurate than “lost”).
This discovery prompted me to think deeply about the role of resistance in our lives: where it comes from, how it manifests, and why it exists. I invite you to explore those questions, too, because wrestling with our resistance might just unlock a surprising sense of freedom.
I hope you enjoy this Contemplation on resistance, and I look forward to hearing your reflections, experiences, and discoveries along the way.
Also, please share your feedback on this new once-a-month section!
The Gate of Resistance
Resistance is the gate to yourself.
Who stands at the threshold—
the one who knocks, or the one who locks the door?If you open the door, does the visitor vanish—
or do you find you were the visitor all along?
What comes up for you? Feel free to take some time. 🩵
About Alex
I’m equal parts old soul and curious wanderer, a farmer boy at heart, and a writer whenever I can corral my ADHD. Ultimately, I write for those who crave rest in a world that never pauses.
As a political psychologist, yoga therapist, and integrative coach—anchored by both research and lived experience—I delve into questions of identity, connection, and wholeness, which are the foundation of my Substack publication, Life as I See It.
If you haven’t yet joined me, I invite you to subscribe for free:
Gah, this prompt/Koan is taking me in all sorts of directions.
First, doors...I need to simply focus on that metaphor alone for a while. The opening and closing of doors, dreams I've had about doors, what "doors" I am desperate to open for my creative writing, etc.
Then, the knocking and locking: What is pulling me toward crossing a new threshold and what is keeping me away? What are my hopes and what are my fears? Do I believe in knocking as invitation, as possibility? Or so I think safety by locking doors and keeping my fears out is a better option?
Then, the visitor: Almost like a shadow or specter, the visitor could be anyone or anything. It's an archetype, much like the door. Who, or what, is beckoning me, and toward what pathway? Is the visitor some type of spiritual companion for me, a divine intelligence guiding me? Am I a visitor to others, accompanying them on their own pathways and encouraging them? If this is a visitor, it means they are a guest. They do not take permanent residence in my life. How will I treat the visitor--as a threat or as a pilgrim?
AND THESE ARE JUST MY FIRST SPONTANEOUS THOUGHTS, ALEX! Thank you!
So glad you have found a different way to follow your path. You always inspire me with interesting concepts that give me food for thought. Resistance brings so many different ideas to me. First came political and I quickly pushed that away since I have no desire to build up more anxiety than what I face daily. The second thought of resistance was about my daily pain, however I find the more I try to resist it the severity of it increases so I meditate as much as possible to lessen what I feel. Negative thoughts are more prevalent in my dreams than in my conscious state so I struggle through most dreams running away from the fearful scary scenarios while dreaming. My final resistance, at least in these moments of contemplation, is to personal anger that arises in me when things I want to get done, don’t get done unless I do them, but my problem is I physically cannot do them. So I’ve lost my independence which angers me. I resist complaining about it as much and as often as I can. I made an appointment for an orthopedic specialist consultation in March but now I find myself resisting the urge to cancel it. I’ve been to so many doctors and gone through so many tests since 2012 and the answers have always been disappointing. My internal argument is hope vs disappointment. So I place these thoughts in limbo. Procrastinating until a definitive solution becomes clear rather than resisting the urge to cancel. And there you have it in a Nutshell about my take on the resistance prompt. Thank you for sharing this and I look forward to the future prompts from you. ❤️🌼